There’s a very clear distinction between being ‘busy’ and being ‘productive’, however.

In some cases we make ourselves busy in order to avoid doing those things that may be more demanding, but really important – or to shield us from having to confront uncomfortable personal issues (see What are you avoiding?)

Over the next week, notice when you are busy and ask your self. Are the things you are doing truly productive? Could you actually delegate some of those tasks, or even drop them all together? Are you caught up in Time Wasters? If so, be ruthless about dropping those activities and concentrate instead on things that are really going to produce a result.

Extra Tip 1

How about coming up with an instant scoring system? Give yourself a mark out of ten on each of the things you find your-self doing throughout the day. If you can’t give it more than a ‘5’ then think seriously about not doing it and moving on to something more productive.

• Annabel Sutton is a Professional Certified Coach and Author.  She has lived in Los Angeles and Indonesia; survived earthquakes and riots, lived with head-hunters and enjoyed a portfolio career.  She now enjoys a somewhat quieter life in Somerset!  Her latest book, 52 Ways to Transform Your Life (Weekly Wisdom for Busy People), contains 52 inspiring, quick-to-read life tips and is available from http://amzn.to/2nSdMb2 . Find more information at  www.annabelsutton.com

And it’s a good one to ponder today, Blue Monday, sometimes even known as Divorce Monday. Researchers say that a combination of short days – thus lack of sunlight – lowered immunity, and the the after effects (financially and emotionally) of the holidays combine to make it the most depressing day of the year and one of the most stressful for relationships.

So here’s a thought on how to address at least some of that sadness.

Covey suggests that in our relationships we build up a strong and healthy ‘bank account’ with others by consistently ‘making deposits’ through acts of kindness, consideration, honesty, keeping commitments, thoughtfulness and so on.

Equally, by treating someone unkindly, criticising, breaking promises, betraying trust, your account diminishes and is in danger of becoming overdrawn.

One of the ways Covey suggests to build up your bank account with the special people in your life is through ‘Understanding the Individual’. Part of this is understanding that what might constitute a deposit for you, might not do so for them. It also means making what is important to the other person as important to you.

Covey writes: “I have a friend whose son developed an avid interest in baseball. My friend wasn’t interested in baseball at all. But one summer, he took his son to see every major league team play one game. The trip took over six weeks and cost a great deal of money.

My friend was asked on his return, ‘Do you like baseball that much…?’

‘No’, he replied, ‘But I like my son that much’… ”

This had a profound impact on me when I read it.

For years my partner and I have been engaged in a bit of a power struggle over cleaning the house! A spotless house is very important to him, and I had tended to rebel when he wanted me to make more of an effort in that direction. Reading Covey’s words stopped me in my tracks. His desire for a clean house suddenly became more important to me as well.

Is there some way that you can apply this to your life this week?

• Annabel Sutton is a Professional Certified Coach and Author.  She has lived in Los Angeles and Indonesia; survived earthquakes and riots, lived with head-hunters and enjoyed a portfolio career.  She now enjoys a somewhat quieter life in Somerset!  Her latest book, 52 Ways to Transform Your Life (Weekly Wisdom for Busy People), contains 52 inspiring, quick-to-read life tips and is available from http://amzn.to/2nSdMb2 . Find more information at  www.annabelsutton.com.

If your home or office needs a visit from the Decluttering Police, here are a few tips to help you to be ruthless about those items you are finding it hard to make a decision about.

Paper Mountain: It can be really hard to throw pieces of paper away – especially when the phrase “but I might need to refer to it later” keeps playing in your head. The most useful tip I’ve come across is to ask yourself – If I did need this in the future, is there some way that I could get hold of it again? In other words, could you ask the person who sent it to you to send you another copy? Could you download the information from the internet? Could you somehow reproduce the information in another way?

If the answer is ‘yes’ it’s a lot easier to make the decision to throw it away.

Clothing, books and other items: If you’re finding it difficult to throw or give something away, try this trick. Get a bin liner, put the items into it, tie it up, put the date on the outside and store it somewhere like the garage or a shed. If you haven’t needed any of the items within twelve months, throw the bag away (or give it to charity) – WITHOUT LOOKING INSIDE!

Ask for help: If you’re still short on will power, choose a friend or colleague who you know to be decisive and ask them to help you. It’s much easier for an outsider to be ruthless.

Hold a Decluttering Party: Make it fun! Get in some treats, and invite some friends round to help you decide which things to keep or which to get rid of. You never know, they might even want to take some of the items off your hands for you!

• Annabel Sutton is a Professional Certified Coach and Author.  She has lived in Los Angeles and Indonesia; survived earthquakes and riots, lived with head-hunters and enjoyed a portfolio career.  She now enjoys a somewhat quieter life in Somerset!  Her latest book, 52 Ways to Transform Your Life (Weekly Wisdom for Busy People), contains 52 inspiring, quick-to-read life tips and is available from http://amzn.to/2nSdMb2 . Find more information at  www.annabelsutton.com.

One of the most effective ways to do this is to take yourself out of the present and transport yourself into the future.

Rather than think about what you would like to happen in the coming year, transport yourself to the end of next year and imagine that everything you wanted to achieve has already happened. What will your life look like in a year’s time? What are you doing? Where are you? Who are you with? What have you achieved? Make this as detailed and vivid as you can. And THINK BIG!

Don’t limit yourself. The key is to write your vision in the PRESENT TENSE – as if it has already happened.

You can use narrative, lists, bullet points or pictures to describe what your life will look like. Or cut out pictures, phrases and captions from magazines. Have fun, get creative and again – think big.

It’s quite miraculous how powerful this exercise can be. Over and over again I’ve been thrilled to witness a client’s delight and amazement when they revisit their one-year vision and realise that they’ve achieved everything they had envisioned – and much more!

So if you want the next year to be a raving success, my tip for this week is to get started on your One Year Vision. Have fun with it – you could even get the family involved, and do a ‘Family Vision’ together.

If you want to take this further, once your vision is finished, you can divide the year into smaller segments. In other words, to achieve your one-year vision, what would you need to have done in 6 months? 3 months? The next month? Keep working on it and seek support if you need it.

Wishing you a happy and peaceful 2015 and all good things in the year to come!

• Annabel Sutton is a Professional Certified Coach and Author.  She has lived in Los Angeles and Indonesia; survived earthquakes and riots, lived with head-hunters and enjoyed a portfolio career.  She now enjoys a somewhat quieter life in Somerset!  Her latest book, 52 Ways to Transform Your Life (Weekly Wisdom for Busy People), contains 52 inspiring, quick-to-read life tips and is available from http://amzn.to/2nSdMb2 . Find more information at  www.annabelsutton.com.

Eventually I decided that I was expending far too much energy worrying about this, so I bit the bullet and bought a stack of them to have in reserve. It’s incredible the difference this made – no longer worrying if I was about to run out – no longer having ‘just enough’ but instead creating a safety cushion for myself.

The idea behind creating reserves is that you always have ‘more than enough’ rather than teetering on the brink of having ‘only just enough’.

Not wasting valuable energy worrying about not having enough can be immensely liberating – you will feel sig­nificantly calmer and more in control, and you will be working from a position of strength rather than a position of need.

Here are some other examples:

• Always have ample petrol in your tank
• Make sure you have sufficient money available for unex­pected emergency expenditures
• Leave early for appointments so that you never have to rush or panic about being late
• Get lots of sleep so that you have reserves of energy
• Book social events into the diary on a regular basis to be sure that you have a sufficient reserve of FUN!

On the cusp of yet another New Year, ask yourself:  Where do YOU need to create reserves?

• Annabel Sutton is a Professional Certified Coach and Author.  She has lived in Los Angeles and Indonesia; survived earthquakes and riots, lived with head-hunters and enjoyed a portfolio career.  She now enjoys a somewhat quieter life in Somerset!  Her latest book, 52 Ways to Transform Your Life (Weekly Wisdom for Busy People), contains 52 inspiring, quick-to-read life tips and is available from http://amzn.to/2nSdMb2 . Find more information at  www.annabelsutton.com.

When we stop and think about it, we can probably recognize many different behaviour patterns in our lives.

Some of these might be having a positive influence,whilst others could be doing quite the opposite. With the holiday  season fast approaching, it can be valuable to take a few minutes to think about some of your behaviour patterns.

Congratulate yourself on those that are likely to contribute positively to your enjoyment of the festivities – and take an honest look at those patterns which are likely to produce less positive results.

• Do you tend to run yourself ragged as a result of other people’s expectations?

• Do you tend to eat or drink far too much over Christmas and the New Year and neglect doing any exercise?

• Do you take the love and support of those round you 101 granted?

• Do you over-spend and then have to spend months repairing the damage to your bank account or overdraft?

Step One: Make yourself AWARE of existing patterns.

Step Two: Recognise that you have a CHOICE:

a)     to continue the existing pattern, or

b)     to consciously let it go and adopt a new pattern that serves; you better.

What new and improved patterns – ones that will serve you well – do you want to take with you into the New Year?

• Annabel Sutton is a Professional Certified Coach and Author.  She has lived in Los Angeles and Indonesia; survived earthquakes and riots, lived with head-hunters and enjoyed a portfolio career.  She now enjoys a somewhat quieter life in Somerset!  Her latest book, 52 Ways to Transform Your Life (Weekly Wisdom for Busy People), contains 52 inspiring, quick-to-read life tips and is available from http://amzn.to/2nSdMb2 . Find more information at  www.annabelsutton.com.

Inevitably, it’s a very expensive time of year, and in the heat of the moment it’s easy to spend more than we can really afford.

Here’s a tip to help ensure there are some extra funds available for the Festive Season, but it can also be applied throughout the rest of the year.

Do you know how much you spend in a week or a month? Do you know what you spend your money on? One way to keep tabs on this is to keep a Spending Log for a week or two – just to see where your hard-earned money is actually going. You might be in for a few surprises.

A friend of mine tried this out and was shocked to discover that she was spending, on average, £30 a week on Cappuccinos – that’s a whopping £120 per month.

Another was equally shocked to realise he had a wine bill approaching £200 per month.

By becoming aware of how you’re spending your money, you can take control of it. You can then decide whether to forego a Latte or two in order to have the extra funds you need to afford something special (not to mention improve your health and well-being) – or, more importantly, to avoid going into the red over the Holiday Season.

• Annabel Sutton is a Professional Certified Coach and Author.  She has lived in Los Angeles and Indonesia; survived earthquakes and riots, lived with head-hunters and enjoyed a portfolio career.  She now enjoys a somewhat quieter life in Somerset!  Her latest book, 52 Ways to Transform Your Life (Weekly Wisdom for Busy People), contains 52 inspiring, quick-to-read life tips and is available from http://amzn.to/2nSdMb2 . Find more information at  www.annabelsutton.com.

Another factor which determines how others perceive us is the way we speak. Not only the tenor or strength of our voice, but the language we use.

Some people really let themselves down by using unassertive and self-deprecating language. Phrases like: “Oh trust me to get that wrong” or “I’m really hopeless at …. ” or “Don’t ask me to do ‘x’ – I’m bound to mess it up … ” give a very clear message about your view of yourself and your abilities.

Self-deprecation is a very ‘British’ thing to do – to make light of your abilities and achievements. But while it’s great to be able to laugh at yourself and not take things too seriously, it should never be at the expense of your self-confidence.

If we want people to take us seriously, and to see us as a competent person, it’s really important to exude a confident persona (even if we don’t always feel it!) and part of that is NOT putting ourselves down in front of others. In fact, don’t put yourself down ever – most especially to yourself.

So here’s an experiment: For the next week just NOTICE each time you use – or are about to use – self-deprecating language. Count the number of times you do it. Then make a conscious choice to stop. If it’s an old, ingrained habit, it may take a while to break, but it’s really worth it.

You are fantastic, capable, wise, creative, clever, powerful and strong. Don’t let your language say otherwise.

• Annabel Sutton is a Professional Certified Coach and Author.  She has lived in Los Angeles and Indonesia; survived earthquakes and riots, lived with head-hunters and enjoyed a portfolio career.  She now enjoys a somewhat quieter life in Somerset!  Her latest book, 52 Ways to Transform Your Life (Weekly Wisdom for Busy People), contains 52 inspiring, quick-to-read life tips and is available from http://amzn.to/2nSdMb2 . Find more information at  www.annabelsutton.com.

I’m becoming more and more convinced of how important it is to give yourself ample ‘down time’ in order to relax, switch your brain off from work and recharge your batteries.

I’ve noticed that many of the women that I work with – espe­cially those with young families – find it a real challenge to take any time out for themselves. They’ve got into the habit of putting everyone else’s needs first and can’t see how they can carve out any ‘me time’.

The self-employed can be equally challenged. I know only too well the perils of running your own business – how all consum­ing it can be – and how very hard it can be to switch your brain off from thinking about work.

Here’s a great analogy: If you’ve flown on a commercial airliner you’ll be familiar with the ‘oxygen mask’ demonstration and you’ll probably have noticed that they always instruct you to make sure that your own mask is fitted before seeing to your children? Well, in life the same principle applies.

You NEED to take care of yourself first in order to be able to care for those around you – be it your family, your friends or your clients. You just can’t work as effectively if you’re exhausted and drained.

So, for the next week, see if you can find a way to make some space for yourself – you may have to get a bit creative and enlist the help and support of others – family, friends – to allow you to have some ‘down time’ – even if it’s just a Sunday morning or an evening to yourself.

Put on your oxygen mask, breathe deeply, and have a great week!

• Annabel Sutton is a Professional Certified Coach and Author.  She has lived in Los Angeles and Indonesia; survived earthquakes and riots, lived with head-hunters and enjoyed a portfolio career.  She now enjoys a somewhat quieter life in Somerset!  Her latest book, 52 Ways to Transform Your Life (Weekly Wisdom for Busy People), contains 52 inspiring, quick-to-read life tips and is available from http://amzn.to/2nSdMb2 . Find more information at  www.annabelsutton.com.

A few years ago I learned that my ex-mother-in-law had died. I was very fond of her, and had always felt sad that the break up of my marriage had resulted in my estrangement from her and my father-in-law.

Every now and again over the years I would think to myself that I really must make the effort to go to London and pop in and see them. I knew that they held no animosity towards me and it would have been really good to repair any misunderstandings that might have taken place, and restore what had once been a close relationship.

I never did it. Now, of course, it’s too late and I regret that I never made the time.

Is there anyone in your life that you would dearly like to have such a meeting – or such a conversation with?

What do you need to say?

If there are any ‘incomplete’ situations in your life, why not make the effort to do whatever you have to do to feel ‘complete’ once more? It may not feel very comfortable, but you’ll be very glad that you did.

• Annabel Sutton is a Professional Certified Coach and Author.  She has lived in Los Angeles and Indonesia; survived earthquakes and riots, lived with head-hunters and enjoyed a portfolio career.  She now enjoys a somewhat quieter life in Somerset!  Her latest book, 52 Ways to Transform Your Life (Weekly Wisdom for Busy People), contains 52 inspiring, quick-to-read life tips and is available from http://amzn.to/2nSdMb2 . Find more information at  www.annabelsutton.com.